This morning I was reading Eckhart Tolle but was having trouble concentrating because I was thinking about something else.
So I felt inadequate as a spiritual being because I was unable to silence my mind.Then I thought about the whole idea about us being creation in perpetual manifestation, universal energy manifesting in the form of humans, God consciousness, etc, and that led to me remembering an ET quote that arrived in my email inbox the other day:
“You are the Universe, which in you is awakening, experiencing itself, becoming conscious.”
If you’re familiar with ET, you’ll know he says loads of stuff about how our thinking minds are not who are, even though we identify ourselves with our thinking minds. We say things like “I think…” whereas he (like in Buddhist philosophy) says it is not actually we who are thinking, that we are not the thinker, but that thoughts pass through our mind and we notice them but that we have become confused by identifying ourselves with our thoughts.
I get fed up with my thinking mind sometimes. These days, I have more and more and longer and longer periods of no-thought (yippee! I think at those times – I’m getting the hang of this spiritual malarky) but then some thought pops up that won’t rest. I believe my thoughts are unwelcome in the world. It seems I exist in a world of minds that are not like mine. Hardly a person seems interested in my thoughts. I believe that I impose my thoughts on others and that they get tired of hearing me ramble on. I feel compelled to write my thoughts though. I can’t hold back. I believe, to spare myself being perceived as a bore, that I ought to control my compulsion to publish my thoughts – frequently I post thoughts (aka opinions) on Facebook then regret it and delete them a few hours later.
Then the thought came to me that I need not be so harsh on myself and my thinking mind. I can perceive myself as being separate from my thoughts while allowing my thoughts to have their own existence while, by happenchance, they reside, and procreate (rampantly and wantonly), in my mind. I do not need to control or stifle my thoughts in order to give expression to my spiritual self. I can give them welcome space in my mind, and I can watch with loving amusement as they frolick in the playground of my mindspace. I thought (!) about how the universal energy (aka God consciousness) manifests through me via thoughts. I saw my thinking mind like a toddler who is excited about showing a parent a painting – the parent may have the opinion that the painting is technically rubbish (when compared with, for example, da Vinci – just one example of the exalted standards we seem to be expected to achieve in every area of our lives) but a loving parent will respond with appreciation none-the-less.
So, I thought that it’s okay for me to allow my mind to speak if that is how God consciousness compels itself to manifest through this incarnation of existence – the Homo sapien labelled “Jenny” – and that to stifle my thinking mind and writing fingers would be to act against God’s will, which is – technically – a sin, and it doesn’t matter if no one is interested in what I have to say because it’s the thinking and the speaking that is the passion, not the being heard.
Big love to my precious mind. Mwah mwah. xxxx